Can't...stop...laughing....

HAAA! The cricket is too depressing for words, so I thought I'd try out this crazy face recognition software that tells you which celebrities you most look like.

Before I crack on with the results, I think readers should bear in mind that I am a white woman in my mid-to-late 20s.

I fear that said software is fucked. This is who I apparently who I bear the biggest resemblance to in the celebrity universe: Wayne Brady. Who he?

Far from being annoyed, I am rather pleased. It certainly beats being told I look like Anne Diamond - a situation which actually occurred during my lardy university days.

Who else do I look like, then? I hope the next one in line is at least female.

Oh, not my day then. I'vd just tried for ten minutes to insert a picture of said person, and Blogger won't let me. Bah. However, it is probably best. Said person is actually Kyle Maclachlan.

Kyle. Maclachlan. Of Sex & The City, "John Thomas", floppy cock fame. Shut up, face recognition software. I've just texted The Fiance (currently en route to Slovenia for his stag do - fitting in with his request of somewhere that has, in his words: "slack guns laws and loose women". Nice) asking him what on earth he sees in me considering his stance as a heterosexual male. He has sent something rather soppy back which I won't repeat here; but despite this boost I fear any confidence I might have had re: not looking like a man in my mid forties may have been shattered forever.

So, what women do I look like (if any)? Probably Hattie Jaques, judging by the way this experiment has gone so far.

Christina Applegate! Rock on! OK, last time I saw her she was in that terrible girls-version-of -Road-Trip movie with Cameron Diaz and Selma Blair; but Don't Tell Mom is one of my favourite films ever. I am feeling somewhat more cheerful.

Gah - Meg Ryan. How the hell can I look like both the Ryan and Kyle Maclachlan? I am mystified; and think I'm going to quit this stupid game for fear of developing severe psychological issues. Also: Freddie's just got a wicket and I wouldn't mind keeping a beady eye on this cricket until lunch. Au revoir till Monday. Keep those fingers crossed for the boys in Brisbane.